Rock Lobster
(Pierson, Kate / Schneider, Fred / Strickland, Keith)
Performed by the B-52's
We were at a party
His ear lobe fell in the deep
Someone reached in and grabbed it
It was a rock lobster
Rock lobster
Rock lobster
We were at the beach
Everybody had matching towels
Somebody went under a dock
And there they saw a rock
It wasn't a rock
It was a rock lobster
Rock lobster
Rock lobster
Rock lobster
Rock lobster
Motion in the ocean
His air hose broke
Lots of trouble
Lots of bubble
He was in a jam
He's in a giant clam
Rock, rock
Rock lobster
Down, down
Underneath the waves
Mermaids wavin'
Wavin' to mermen
Wavin' sea fans
Sea horses sailin'
Dolphins wailin'
Rock lobster
Rock lobster
Rock lobster
Rock lobster
Red snappers snappin'
Clam shells clappin'
Mussels flexin'
Flippers flippin'
Rock, rock
Rock lobster
Down, down
Lobster
Rock lobster
Rock
Let's rock
Boys in bikinis
Girls in surfboards
Everybody's rockin'
Everybody's fruggin'
Twistin' 'round the fire
Havin' fun
Bakin' potatoes
Bakin' in the sun
Put on your nose guard
Put on the lifeguard
Pass the tannin' butter
Here comes a stringray
There goes a manta ray
In walked a jelly fish
There goes a dogfish
Chased by a catfish
In flew a sea robin
Watch out for that piranha
There goes a narwhal
Here comes a bikini whale
Rock lobster
Rock lobster
Rock lobster
Rock lobster
Rock Lobster was another song that I loved as a kid and would put it the same "New Music" category as Echo Beach or anything by Robert Palmer: these songs had a totally different sound than the '70s rock or the disco that was also playing on the radio, but it wasn't quite as out there as Punk or New Wave. Whenever Rock Lobster came on at a school dance, it was certain to fill up the dance floor, and everyone loved when the song would slow down in the middle with the down, down part -- we always had fun slowly collapsing to the floor and then popping back to life when the beat returned. So much fun!
I'm thinking about this song right now because we're on our annual trip to my parents' house in Nova Scotia, and there is sure to be a lobster feast at some point (the pictures above are from a few years ago). As always, it's so strange being here -- I feel like I'm fulfilling some obligation to visit, yet my parents seem ambivalent about us being here. Right now, I'm in the house alone. Here's the story of my first ever visit down here:
Kennedy wasn't quite one yet, and my parents wanted to bring us down to see where they were in the process of building their retirement house; back on the lake my Dad would swim in as a kid. My Mum drove my Dad's Yukon down with me and Kennedy, and as Dad only had a long weekend to spend here, we picked him up at the airport on the way to the house. At that time, they only had the garage with its one bedroom apartment built, but it was more than big enough for the four of us to stay in.
One night, we went out to dinner for fried clams and the atmosphere was just tense: even though I was now a mother myself, I may as well have been a little kid again, nervously waiting for the coming explosion that I remembered so well from my childhood. When we got back to the apartment, I took Kennedy into the bedroom and listened to my parents having a screaming match in the outer room. Eventually, my Dad came in and told me he was driving back to Ontario right away, and if I knew what was good for me, I'd come with him.
"What'll happen with Mum?" I asked.
"Frankly, I don't care," he said.
"I don't think she'll be okay here by herself."
"Maybe it's best you stay then." And he left -- driving away, leaving the three of us in the woods.
What we didn't know right away was that as soon as Dad left -- ever the planner -- he called Dave and asked him to drive my Mum's car down for us. Somehow, Dad arranged to give Dave a thousand dollars, and as it was the weekend, Dave took off right away, delivering us transportation (and cash) within about 18 hours. We didn't have a landline or cell service here, and my mother couldn't believe that Dad abandoned us like that, so we had to walk forever to the only phone booth around here to learn that salvation was on its way.
Dave could only stay for another day and then he used Dad's original plane ticket to get back home. In order to save face, Mum kept telling everyone that Dad got called back early and we proceeded with our original itinerary (which included my inlaws coming here to stay with us and then a trip to PEI). For the rest of the trip, I had to listen to my mother trashtalk my father, and I felt miserable and trapped the entire time.
That would be why I've never been willing to come down here without my own vehicle -- I swear I will never again be trapped down here; the only time we ever flew, we rented our own car at the airport. And no matter how many lobster dinners or toys they may have (including the ponies they had for my girls when they were little, the ATVs, boats and Seadoo) I will always have a bitter taste in my mouth the entire time I'm here.
Which is just so stupid because I see no evidence that my parents do more than just go through the motions of pretending they want us here. We'll only be here for four full days this year and they're currently not talking with one another. They still can't hold it together for four days? So why do I think it's healthy for my girls to believe that they have two sets of loving grandparents? Why do I try and force them to believe that they have something I never had?
At least there will be lobster.
