Mind Picking : Farewell 2022

 

I have a sense that this is how a blog dies: Looking back over the past year, I don't feel like I experienced much or accomplished much — I certainly didn't read as much as in previous years; the reviews for which is the ostensible reason for this writing space — and there's sadly not much that I did record of my life as 2022 ticked by. Today is actually a few days into the new year and Dave and I are taking a week at Sauble Beach — the picture above was taken yesterday at the halfway mark of a three hour walk — and while this is the first chance that I have bothered set aside to review the year that was, I want to embrace the spirit of that picture above (out exploring with my dog and my loving husband instead of feeling like a sorry bump on a log) and take that attitude into 2023. When I look back at 2019 — the 'Year of the Grand River' and the amazing local adventures we experienced — only attitude has really prevented us (me) from having another satisfying year like that; so here's to carrying that more spirited attitude forward! And so, to the overdue roundup of the events of 2022.

I told the long story of the renter-turned-squatter who turned our lakehouse into a flophouse for meth users as part of my Halloween post last year, so while I don't want to give that sorry human being any more of my head space, I will admit that working on getting her out took pretty much all of our attention for the first five months of 2022. And once she was gone (thank the spirits that watch over us; I'm not even kidding), getting the lakehouse back into shape took much time and effort heading into summer (but it's hard to regret spending most of June at Sauble, even if that is where Dave and I both eventually got hit with [mild] Covid). We also had the privilege of spending most of September at the lakehouse, after the summer renters had left, and we enjoyed wonderful sunny beach days and many good meals on the various patios; we were even able to have Thanksgiving at Sauble with Kennedy and Zach; we were delighted that Rudy and Dan took a week at the lakehouse with friends and that Kennedy could have a weekend with her girlfriends; sharing the space with friends and family is what it's all about.

At the beginning of October, Mallory felt much of her life was in crisis: Her employer announced that she would be closing her business (despite Mallory and a couple of coworkers spending months attempting to buy her out instead); her apartment situation was becoming untenable — dealing with rats, sewer backups, and a slumlord landlord, Mallory despaired that she couldn't even afford to move because rents are undeniably out of control — and to top it off, her car died. Dave and I discussed it and decided to offer Mallory — who claims she will never want a big white wedding — the same amount of money we will be spending on her sister's 'big' wedding in 2023 as a down payment on a home for herself, and by the end of October, Mallory had bought and taken possession of a one bedroom condo for herself; no parking, but no worries, because no car anymore. Now: the only way that Mallory could afford a place at all was because the condo was really dated and dirty, but after she held a Halloween party there — at which her friends were told to not even worry about spills on the already stained carpet — Dave and I spent every spare minute of November tearing that place down to the walls and fixing it back up again. (And I need to add: Kennedy was so worried about me burning out that she took time off work, and worked from the unfinished condo on more than one occasion, to make sure I had her physical help when I needed it. I guess I have moved into the age where my adult children start to think of me as frail, despite my self-image as strong. I am grateful for Kennedy's help and concern — I literally could not have done what I did without her — even if her ultimate concerns feel premature just yet.)

                                                                  

  

Mallory was able to get a new and better job right around the corner from her new home (that seems meant to be; she doesn't really even need a car anymore), and other than concerns for her figuring out where her education should go, we feel good that we were able to make her feel settled. Settled enough to decide to share her life and her home with her new kitty, Gonzo!

Those two big events (getting the renter out of the lakehouse and getting Mallory into a condo) feel, in retrospect, to be the only two things that happened in 2022, and as work got crazy busy for me leading up to and over Christmas, I'm left, at the end of the year, feeling like I didn't do much at all. I ended last year commenting that my book club didn't seem to have noticed that I had quit them, and indeed, I never did go back (and only one member ever reached out to ask me what was up; it was saddening, but ultimately unsurprising, to conclude that these were never really my friends). I grew less than enchanted with my boot camp buddies, too: Early in the year I read the book Cultish (about how American corporations — and especially those in the health and fitness industries — use the language of cults to reinforce loyalty to their brands), and although the book itself didn't make it to my best of 2022 lists (see below), it did seem to describe what feels false in my relationships at the gym. Also: I had planned to do the Mud Girl Run again this year (it was certainly fun when we did it as a group in 2019), but I was less enthusiastic when Rudy told me that she was planning a girls' weekend with Jenny and Debbie that would begin as soon as the run was over (these are her friends, even if they have included me in their plans a couple of times, but my nose was a bit out of joint thinking that I'd be driving myself there and back home alone so they could all travel together). So when I got Covid and couldn't go anyway, I just felt even more disconnected from the entire group, but also kind of relieved; these aren't really my friends, either. What a change from the happy, connected year I had in 2019. On the other hand, Kennedy started coming to the gym with me in November and that has been wonderful: nothing better than seeing that smiling face early every morning (and even the coaches have commented on the happy, energetic vibe she brings to the space; it's good to remember what ties really matter in the end.)

I guess I can still blame Covid for acting like a recluse this year — even though Dave resumed international travel for work wihout incident, we didn't go any further than the lakehouse together this year (not even down to Nova Scotia to see Mum and Dad, but I'm still bitter about Dad not coming to Kennedy's backyard wedding last year, so we'll see what will entice me to go back down there again) — but beyond enjoying some sunny patio dinners around home this year, I can only remember going out a total of three times: Kennedy and I went to Stratford in October to see Death and the King's Horseman (written about here), and we were unsurprised (maybe even relieved) that the audience wore masks throughout the performance.

Preshow dinner

The family took me out to dinner and a movie for my birthday (for some reason choosing the Christmas-themed dark comedy Violent Night, which was bad enough to make me laugh throughout, so, well chosen I guess, lol), and that was the first movie I've been to in forever. And later in December, Dave and I went to see Barenaked Ladies (for something like the tenth time?) for their Hometown Holidays show (fantastic time, as ever!).

And, as we do every year, we end with the holidays and the whole family coming over for a Christmas Eve get together. And although it is so much work — and particularly when it's in the middle of my exhaustion from a retail job — when my kids, separately, gave me a hug and thanked me for all I do to make Christmas special, it's all worth it and I will happily do it over and over again.

That's the year that was, and now, as in previous years, I present my top reads (because, again, this is the ostensible reason I am here) in no particular order.

                                                       Top Ten New Fiction

 The Colony

This would have been my pick for the Booker this year: between the powerful sentences and the overall message about the effects of colonialism, I simply loved it.

Liberation Day : Stories What can I say? George Saunders fires up my brain.  The Night Ship I love Jess Kidd's voice, always look forward to reading her books, and this one did not disappoint: sweet, sweet words telling a fascinating tale.   The Passenger      Stella Maris  I can't not include the two new Cormac McCarthys on this list: as I wrote in my reviews of these, they may not hang completely satisfactorily on their own as novels, but as a capstone to McCarthy's writing career, they feel destined to be classics. In contrast to the above established authors, I found so many new-to-me indie writers who moved me this year:  Immortal North Combining my favourite elements of a northern setting and relatable human drama, this certainly did reach my 'jaded heart'.  Compass Another tale from the Canadian north, everything about this worked for me.   Chouette Such a strange and moving tale of motherhood's unexpected challenges; loved every bit of it.  Motherthing As I wrote in my review, this is 'crisp and fizzy and so, so dark', and what's not to love about that?  One's Company From absurd to sublime, I think I was exactly the right audience for this retro feminist manifesto.                                  Top Ten Nonfiction Books Read in 2022 These can be grouped into the most interesting memoirs:    Run Towards the Danger: Confrontations with a Body of Memory    I'm Glad My Mom Died     Jennie's Boy: A Newfoundland Childhood My favourite social/hostorical commentary:  Butts: A Backstory   Laughing with the Trickster: On Sex, Death, and Accordions   Rogues: True Stories of Grifters, Killers, Rebels and Crooks   Muppets in Moscow With honourable mentions in this category to: Which as You Know Means Violence; Hanged in Medicine Hat; Culture: The Story of Us; The Revolt Against Humanity; and This is Assisted Dying. My favourite literary commentary:   The Curse of the Marquis de Sade  Super-Infinite: The Transformations of John Donne  The Jane Austen Remedy (This last was the impetus for me to finally read [probably reread? I know I picked up some Austen in my youth] Pride and Prejudice; The Colony [above] prompted me to read The Moon and Sixpence; and simply because it was available on NetGalley, I read The Easy Life; all wonderful classics and I hope to read more in the upcoming year.) Honourable mentions in this category: Six Walks; And a Dog Called Fig; and The Fairy Tellers.) Maybe it's not a total surprise that I seem more engaged with nonfiction —  I kind of feel like I've read all the possible permutations with fictional plots by now and it takes a weird angle to fire my brain with a novel — and  I should also note something rather extraordinary: The end of 2022 marks the end of my initial 'ten year project' ( to read and review a hundred books a year, and hopefully [it seemed like such a bold reach at the time!] to eventually be able to point at a thousand examples of what I thought of something.) So over the course of these past ten years, I have actually read and reviewed 1322 books (slightly more than that as I have reviewed a couple here that I didn't bother putting onto goodreads), and that is something I'm proud of; and especially as these reviews have made me feel like I have left a mark in the void. Okay, so obviously, this is not the death of this blog just yet. I reckon building on that review count will keep me engaged for a while yet. Not to mention that Dave and I are planning another big adventure this year, and I really need to remember how satisfying it was when we engaged in so many local adventures back in 2019, so I know there will be things to memorialise here, if only to aid my future memory. Also while on our walk yesterday, I sent this picture of a 'fairy ring of snow' to my girls from that halfway point. It enchanted me and I need to remember to keep my eyes open to enchantments. Here's to 2023: it will be what I make of it! (Why is that always so hard to remember year after year?)